RE-SCUED (Again)

(Photo credits to google) 

Time had just hit me, this is the time that I felt the need of finding myself again. I knew it. I needed to understand for the second time what it meant to be saved and how salvation works in my life.

I am a young woman who received Jesus as my personal Lord and Savior 11 years ago. Little did I know that the fire in my heart is slowly dying. I am unaware to my consciousness that my life will be a mess now. No, I did not commit anything wrong or sin against my belief. I am living my life as it is still aiming to give God the glory in everything I do. But I have this empty hole in my heart that I kept on denying to myself that something is really wrong within me.

Everything looks just so perfect and beautiful in the eyes of many people surrounding me. But I feel so lonely, unloved and not okay, that's how I can describe it. I know the reason but I cannot help myself with reasons I don't know. But I am still grateful that the Lord still reminds me of his undying love for me.

I always thought that I could rebel against God. Not by doing bad things, nor by not praying. But through not reading and meditating His word consistently. I felt so distant with God. It is because I am not reading His word.

I have proven that His love for me is unconditional. He still loves me even if I don't deserve it.

I read my One-2-One booklet again, and God reminded me that what makes me distant to Him is because of sin. I know I have my shortcomings and intentionally sin against my Holy God, but I am thankful that  He did not let me dwell on that. It could be just thoughts, lustful thoughts, or actions, ungodly actions that will not bring glory to my God, but I am thankful.. He rescued me from time to time and convictions from Him never left me. I know I need help and God had been on my side from the beginning of this inner war of mine.

(Photo credits to google)

Thank you Lord for rescuing me. Thank you for redeeming me or being so lost in my purpose. I want to have myself back. I want to pick up every pieces of me that has been broken for quite so long. I want to have the fire in my heart of knowing you deeper. I want you in my life in all areas of it. I want you forever and nothing could ever change that. You are my peace. You are my hope. You are my happiness. My life will never be at its best if not all because of you. You have planned my life the way it should be and I am giving you the throne of my life once again in decision making, in all things. Lord, forgive me of my sins. Sorry for hurting you, sorry for making you jealous. Sorry for not giving my 100% self. And sorry for having a divided heart. My heart should be undivided and it should be all yours. Lord, occupied my heart and make me feel secured in your loving arms. Thank you Lord for your everlasting love!!!!! I love you forever!!! Thank you for your forgiveness. I received it.. in JESUS mighty name, AMEN! =)

(Photo credits to google)

Lovelots,
Len =)

Tamang Panahon❤️

Pabalik na ako ng Jeddah bukas, September 8, 2015. Matapos ang isang linggong extension ng dahil sa kapalpakan ko. Anyways, I have forgiven myself. So, let me not say goodbye but rather, SEE YOU THE SOONEST!❤️

Bebsy ko, hindi ko alam kung sa anong paraan ko sasabihin sayo lahat ng gusto kong sabihin. Hayaan mo na gawin ko ito sa pamamagitan ng sulat na ito.

Be, salamat. Hindi man sapat pero salamat. Maraming salamat sa higit isang buwan na nilaan mo para makasama ako sa aking bakasyon. Simula ng umalis ako last year, I always look forward to seeing you and to be with you the soonest. Nagpapasalamat ako sa Panginoon kasi pinayagan nya ako makauwi hindi after 2years, hindi din after a year, kundi exactly after 11months since we last saw each other. Alam natin pareho na walang wala tayo sa harap ng Panginoon if not because of His grace, but Im grateful that during this season of my life ikaw yun kasama ko. Hindi perfect, pero alam kung ano ang dapat itama at alam kung anong ang mali sa tama. Thank you be sa labis na pagmamahal mo sa akin.

Nagpapasalamat ako kasi ang selfless mo magmahal tapos ako selfish. Ang generous mo tapos ako madamot. Thank you for always showing me your love on your own simple yet lovely ways.

Thank you kasi sa loob ng dapat 30 days lang na bakasyon ko hindi ka nasawa na puntahan ako mula sa Pasig kung saan ka nakatira papunta sa amin sa Tanay araw araw pagkatapos ng trabaho mo. Nagkaron ako ng problema pabalik nun 30th day ko dito at unexpected ang pag extend ko ng isang linggo pa. Akala ko hindi mo na ako pupuntahan kasi 30 days lang ako dapat pero naextend din ang pagod at effort mo na puntahan ako.. Araw araw. Walang palya. Minsan pa nga hindi na tayo nagkikita sa gabi kasi gagabihin ka ng husto dahil nag attend ka pa ng service sa Fort, pero secured ako pag gising ko papunta ka na sa bahay galing kina Nanay. :) or sa salas ka natulog kasama ng mga kapatid ko tapos magkikita na lang tayo pag gising ko mula sa kwarto ko. Alam ko un pagtitiis mo, yung paghihintay mo sa tamang panahon natin at malapit na yun. Salamat sa tapat na pagmamahal sa kabila ng masama kong ugali tinanggap at minahal mo pa din ako. 

Be, aalis na ako bukas. Ihahatid mo ako. Tapos balik ulit tayo sa Facetime, WeChat at Facebook ng isang taon pa tapos God's willing mag eexit muna ako para sa kasal natin. I will be praying with you kung ano ang plano ng Lord sa atin. Kung makakasunod ka sa Jeddah or ano ba. Hindi ko alam. Basta magtiwala lang tayo sa Lord na maganda ang plano nya para sa atin. We just need to obey kahit maging gaano kahirap. Magkasama tayo dito. This is our battle. Together with the Lord.

Ayoko na sana umiyak kasi take 2 na ito ng alis ko. Pero naiiyak pa din ako. Mamimiss kita. Alam ko mabilis lang ang isang taon. Hihinayon kita makusond ha. Kung hindi man, hintayin mo ako makabalik. Naging sobrang masaya tayong magkasama ngayon, mas magiging masaya tayo next year dahil ikakasal na tayo. :) The Lord will surely provide for us. Pagpray mo ako palagi ha. Pagpray mo tayo. Mag iingat ka palagi. Huwag ka magpapaulan. Magvisit ka kay Dra. Sa St. lukes para sa certificate na hinihingi mo. Tapos yung passport mo balitaan mo ako at pati sa mga application mo balitaan mo ako. 

Palagi mo ako imemesage sa facebook or sa wechat, palagi mo ako tatawagan. Pro kagaya ng palagi mong sinasabi mahal mo ako kahit minsan hindi on time ang mga message mo sakin wala akong dapat isipin dahil kahit anong mangyari magiging tapat tayo sa isat isa. Masaya ako kasi ikaw ang boyfriend ko noon na fiance ko ngayon at husband next year and syempre ang magiging Tatay ng mga magiging anak ko. Beeeeeeeeeeee! I love you! Kiss ng madami at yakap ng mahigpit! Thank you for always waiting for the right time. IT WILL ALWAYS BE WORTH THE WAIT!!! I PROMISE YOU!!!

I love you be! Im looking forward to waking up each morning with you by my side. :) Konti na lang mapupuntahan na natin lahat ng gusto natin puntahan without restrictions and with complete freedom! Konting hintay na lang... Mabuti pa din ang Lord!

Ingat ka palagi. Mwuaah!😘😔

Love lots,

Len. 

New Season: Officially Engaged! 💍❤️

080315💜

Kahit parang joke ang proposal mo dahil hindi mo nadeliver ng maayos ang lines mo...masaya ako na magpapakasal na tayo! :) 

Iloveyou bebsy ko! 😘😍

Thank you Lord for another undeserved favor. We will forever hold on to your promises, because you're God and you're good!!! Glory to youuuuuu. :)

041915|BREAKING THE FAST

Jeddah- 3AM | Philippines- 8AM

This is how we do it.

Yey! Finally, we see each other again. I miss you.

My prayers are all the same. 

To be under God's will as we walk along our journey as couple

To have His strength in the midst of our battlefield

To love God above all

To clean our heart and mind towards lustful thoughts.

To guard our heart towards anything

To do only what pleases the Lord

To flee from anything that will dishonor God

Thank You Lord for being our faithful God!

To you be the highest GLORY!

❤️💕

DAY 7: IN THE MIDST OF OUR BATTLEFIELD

Yey! Last day today and tomorrow will be our breaking the fast! Im excited to see my bebsy!! Thank you Lord for your faithfulness in our lives. May you be forever magnified in all things. May your strength be forever our strength. Lord I pray that you will continuously guard our heart towards anything that will dishonor you. Protect our thoughts from lustful things. Remind us to always fix our eyes on you. I know Lord that as much as we wanted to do things to glorify you, Satan is just around the corner looking at our weakest point to devour us. Lord please dont allow it. Lord please protect us all the time. Give us wisdom to know if we are about to dishonor you in any ways even in small things. Lord all I want is this relationship to be pleasing to you, to bring more glory to your name. Thank you Lord. 

In Jesus' mighty and powerful name, AMEN.

DAY 6: IN THE MIDST OF OUR BATTLEFIELD

I am too emotional if I did not receive offline messages from him. ;(

I miss him.

DAY 5: IN THE MIDST OF OUR BATTLEFIELD

To wake up each day reading his goodmorning messages is one of the many things that could make me happy :)

As we go along on this journey, I still have a lot of things to learn about us but I am thankful because thru this mutual decision that we had, our conversation became more genuine. Thank you Lord. Please keep us this way... IN JESUS' NAME AMEN!!!

He called me at 1am to say i love you.. One minute call to make my sleep more sweet and wonderful.. 

I woke up with a smile on my face as I listen to his morning audio message.

Such a wonderful feeling. I love you Lord! ❤️